


Goodbyes (choose your character)

by Castiels_Broken_Fool



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Depression, F/M, Heartache, Heartbreak, M/M, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-04
Updated: 2018-04-04
Packaged: 2019-04-18 07:51:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,330
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14208576
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Castiels_Broken_Fool/pseuds/Castiels_Broken_Fool
Summary: Reader and character express themselves through a song thsy both hear while they rant to themselves at the same time in a different room/area than the other





	Goodbyes (choose your character)

 

**{Characters(Sam/Castiel/Dean) thoughts}**

_You must think that I'm stupid_  
__Y__ _ _ou must think that I'm a fool__  
__You must think that I'm new to this__  
__But I have seen this all before__

 

I always felt it... when we fought... any little fight... any little petty thing, I expected it. It was coming, I was waiting... each time pushed me further and further away from you, no matter how close I held you. How many times we said "sorry", or "I love you", sweetheart it's something I saw only once in my life and she and I had a family together, she gave me: a taste of apple pie life, of freedom, a heaven on earth which I believed impossible,  before tossing me out on the street. So, just because I let you wiggle your way in, means nothing.  Remember sweetheart, I have the power to lead you on, make you think I'm okay, that it's all good, that you're in control, then the moment you leave me, I can show you that it was all a safety net.

 

_I'm never gonna let you close to me_ _Even though you mean the most to me._ _'Cause every time I open up, it hurts._ _So I'm never gonna get too close to you._ _Even when I mean the most to you._ _In case you go and leave me in the dirt_

 

I want to let you in but how am I supposed to trust you? All the past lovers, the hard love life I grew up with? How are you supposed to be any different? Why do you get to be special? Because you promise you'll stick around? Don't you know you're not the first to tell me that... that you're not the first to hold me tight, kiss me to sleep and make sure that I don't have a nightmare for the rest of the nights we spend together? Don't you know that you're not the first one I had tell me they loved me eternally no matter what? that it was all just in my head they would leave, that I was just being  a paranoid bastard? Then guess what... they left... 

 

_But every time you hurt me, the less_ _that I cry_ ,  _And every time you leave me, the quicker these tears dry._ _And every time you walk out, the less I love you._ _Baby, we don't stand a chance, it's sad but it's true_

 

I can't believe you think that just because you saved me one time makes you think I would give you a chance. You don't understand how ready I am for you to just walk away. My tears have already dried, my hearts already breaking and I'm slowly healing, waiting for the heartache you will leave me in any day now... I'm just waiting... I am, it's only to protect myself from something I'm so used to.

 

_I'm way too good at goodbyes_ _(I'm way too good at goodbyes)_ _I'm way too good at goodbyes_ _(I'm way too good at goodbyes)_

 

 

**{Reader's P.O.V}**

I don't get it... I'm doing all I know how... I'm doing my damndest but I feel it coming, it will rear its ugly head any day now... you're gonna tell me to go... that I messed up some how. It's all my fault, I didn't do my best. you're gonna tell me it's over and that I lost this game of love because I didn't try hard enough, I let you slip through the cracks of my hands as if you were just water I had collected for a quick drink.

 

_I know you're thinking I'm heartless_  
__I__ __know you're thinking I'm cold__ __I'm just protecting my innocence__ __I'm just protecting my soul__

I know why you shrug me off, make me leave you alone in your dark hours... you don't trust me and while I'm not surprised, it stings... how could you compare me to someone I don't know and someone who definitely didn't deserve you if they left you behind so broken like this.

 

I know youre just shielding yourself, but what about me? I have to be ready too, so yes, I'll leave you alone, you have to understand my mind travels the same path, it's terrifying to think one day I'll wake up to find you gone, or you tell me to leave. You're all I have, how am I supposed to live with that... so yes, I eventually start pushing you away, shutting you out, building a wall to protect what emotions I may have left from a damage we are only creating ourselves.

 

**{Character P.O.V}**

_I'm never gonna let you close to me_  
__E__ _ _ven though you mean the most to me__ __'Cause every time I open up, it hurts__

 

No, you don't think that it doesn't bother me... you don't think it tears me apart knowing that I hurt you on a daily basis and you...  you don't think it makes me feel weak on the inside knowing that you, you did absolutely nothing but support me and here I am waiting for the other shoe to drop, waiting for my heaven to fall upon me... waiting for my nightmares to swallow me whole? Is it so hard to understand that... it's not you it's me and even then it's not me it's us?

 

__So I'm never gonna get too close to__ _you_ __Even when I mean the most to you__  
__In case you go and leave me in the dirt__

 

I don't wanna be near you, I don't wanna be hurt by you even if it is just my past making its way to the front from the recesses of my mind. Even if you say you won't you might, even if you say I'll catch you if you fall, what if you don't... what am I supposed to do. I'm so used to being let down how am I supposed to risk another heartbreak when I don't even have a heart left to break.

  
**{BOTH READER AND CHARACHTER P.O.V}**

_But every time you hurt me, the less that I cry_ __And every time you leave me, the quicker these tears dry_ _ __And every time you walk out, the less I love you_ _ __Baby, we don't stand a chance, it's sad but it's true_ _

 

The more I see you turn your back the easier it is to hide the tears, the quicker it is to dry them up and the more challenging thing to do is to pretend it never happens when we both know it does. When you turn away, the more I disconnect, my heart and soul are yearning for you less and less but I'm scared to let go of the one good thing because if you love it aren't you supposed to fight for it? If so, why do we fight against it? We are slowly falling away and we try to ignore the reality of it but if we bothed walked away neither of us would be worried.

  
**[Character]**  
I'm way to good at goodbyes

 

**[Reader]**  
(I'm way to good at goodbyes)

 

**[Character]**  
I'm way too good at goodbyes

 

**[Reader]**

(I'm way too good at goodbyes)

 

**[Character]**  
No way that you'll see me cry

 

**[Reader]**  
(No way that you'll see me cry)

 

**[Character]**  
I'm way too good at goodbyes

 

**[Reader]**

(I'm way too good at goodbyes)

 

**[Character]**  
No  
No, no, no, no, no

  
**[Reader]**  
(I'm way too good at goodbyes)

 

**[Character]**  
No, no, no, no  
No, no, no

 

**[Reader]**  
(I'm way too good at goodbyes)  
(No way that you'll see me cry)  
(I'm way too good at goodbyes)

 

**[Both POV]**  
'Cause every time you hurt me, the less that I cry  
And every time you leave me, the quicker these tears dry

And every time you walk out, the less I love you  
Baby, we don't stand a chance, it's sad but it's true  
I'm way too good at goodbyes.

**Author's Note:**

> [Okay, so, a little A/N:  
> Basically, I wanted it to seem like they were talking to one another but thwy are not. They are in seperate rooms, away from one another but ya know how they do in movies where its the same scene but the characters arent aware of the fact they are having the same thoughts and singing the same song run through their mind kinda thing? Thats what I went for. Also, im sorry this took so long, but it was hard and even then, it may have ended up boring, lemme know what you guys think, it was difficult to get out. Anyways love you guys]


End file.
